Authorities believe that a former American Idol wannabe and long-time Paula Abdul fan may have committed suicide outside of Paula’s house sometime on Tuesday!  The fan, Paula Goodspeed, was found in a car that was parked a few feet away from Paula’s L.A. home on Tuesday and had apparently died of a drug overdose.

The 30 year old Goodspeed auditioned for American Idol back in 2005.  When she told Idol producers she had been a fan of Paula’s for over 17 years, she was featured in a vignette on the show that showcased her various artwork featuring Paula (which included life-sized drawings of the singer).  More recently, she’d also described Paula as her ”secret crush” on her MySpace page.  Goodspeed’s audition didn’t go over so well with the judges when she appeared on the show, which she apparently struggled with afterwards, and she later wrote of her experience on the show:

“It’s very hard reading such awful things being written about yourself…or hearing things being said…not like a lot of people would understand what it’s like having so many haters, just because I made the mistake of trying out for a singing competition before I was ~even~ ready vocally, emotionally and physically.

“I have to believe there is ~something good about me…”

According to E!, Goodspeed had tried to contact Paula several times in the past, had sent the singer threatening letters and packages, and had even tried committed suicide outside of Paula’s house last summer.  Apparently, Paula had been notified of the possibility that Goodspeed might be planning to return to her house again.  When Goodspeed’s mother was unable to locate her earlier this week, she reportedly notified authorities that she was missing and alerted them that she might be found at Paula’s home.

Paula was not in town at the time of Goodspeed’s suicide this week.

VERY SAD AND VERY SCARY!

FWO-ForWomenOnline.com!